Why should I talk to my boss about my menopause symptoms—and how?
Cover Honest and open conversations with managers and senior leaders are crucial for employee well-being, productivity and a sense of belonging
Why should I talk to my boss about my menopause symptoms—and how?

For She Speaks, Lisa Tarquini, menopause nutritionist and founder of The Menopause Space, shares the importance of having open and honest conversations about menopause in the workplace—and how to broach them

“I would rather crawl under a table than talk about menopause at work.” 

That was the reaction from an HR lead in a corporate organisation where I was delivering a menopause awareness session recently.

It’s a statement that unfortunately reflects the viewpoint of many women in the workplace. A 2019 UK menopause at work survey by the Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development, highlighted that 34 per cent of women were embarrassed about their menopause symptoms and chose not to speak up at work. The survey also found that 32 per cent of women said that an unsupportive manager was the reason menopause wasn't discussed at work. 

After hearing the statement from this senior female leader, I wondered how I was going to convince her and others with the same opinion that advocating for their health in the workplace is important, not only for them as individuals but for the performance of the organisation.

See also: It’s time we learnt that menopause usually isn’t a time of poor mental health

Why broach the topic of menopause at work?

Generally, work improves women’s mental well-being, since it positively affects self-esteem, health and diminishes psychological stress. Work also contributes to women’s quality of life, in particular during midlife when for many the task of ‘raising children’ is (almost) fulfilled and so there is more room for work and self-development. However, the menopause transition often intersects with this period in a woman’s career and there may need to be discussion and working adjustments to support a woman during this time. 

As menopause still has many generational and social stigmas attached to it—including the ageism stigma—discussing menopause with your boss can be a challenge, but it’s important for fostering understanding and accessing support. 

Honest and open conversations with managers and senior leaders are crucial for employee well-being, productivity and a sense of belonging. 

How to have the conversation

So, when it comes to menopause, how do you talk to your boss? Here are three tips on how to approach the menopause conversation at work:

1. Prepare in advance

  • Identify the symptoms and effects of menopause that you are experiencing, such as hot flashes, mood changes and sleep disturbances, and assess how they are impacting your quality of life and performance at work.
  • Become familiar with any workplace policies on health, medical coverage and employee assisted programmes available to support you during your menopause transition.
  • Request specific adjustments such as flexible hours, a cooler workspace, or access to breaks, and explain how these adjustments can enhance your productivity and overall well-being.

2. Timing matters

  • Request a private meeting at a time when your boss is not rushed or stressed ensuring confidentiality and respect. Also, consider avoiding busy periods or times when your boss might be distracted.

3. Be open to discussion

  • Encourage dialogue by inviting your boss to ask questions or express concerns. Understand that not all bosses will be familiar with menopause and therefore be patient, informative and prepared for different reactions.
  • Keep the conversation factual and succinct by only sharing how you’re feeling and what you need, as this can help your manager or leader understand better.
  • Summarise the discussion after the meeting and send a brief email about what was discussed and any agreed-upon accommodations.
  • Check in regularly and keep the lines of communication open to discuss how things are going.

Talking to your boss about menopause requires preparation, clarity and a professional approach. By addressing your needs openly, you can access the necessary resources and adjustments to feel better and foster a supportive work environment that benefits both you and your employer.

Breaking the silence and being open about menopause will shatter the stigma around it—the HR lead I met, for example, was empowered with a better understanding and awareness of the topic—to pave the way for others to seek support.

This story is part of Front & Female's series She Speaks, through which we aim to drive open, inclusive and unfiltered conversations tackling the sensitive topics that impact women.

Lisa Tarquini is on a mission to raise awareness and to educate and empower anyone and everyone impacted by menopause. She is a UK Registered Nutritionist specialising in perimenopause and menopause, a Licensed Menopause Champion, and founder of The Menopause Space.

What The Fog 2024: Closing The Menopause Gap at Work Across Asia Pacific, an event dedicated to driving conversation and action around menopause, takes place in Hong Kong on October 18, 2024. Click here for more information and tickets.

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